Shame

February 3, 2012 by · 7 Comments

I think I want to delete my account in Facebook! I just shared a porn video to some of my friends without my knowledge! And to think that I rarely open my account and they’re not even my close friends and they just added me because we were classmates in grade school high school college or we met somewhere in the past but we barely know each other and I was just being polite so I accepted their friend request and now I just shared a humiliating thing on their wall and so now you can just imagine how humiliated I am. What the eff! This is so embarrassing :( There is no option to have the video removed. I’m going nuts! How do I fix this? Somebody help me. Please.

Edit:

Hahaha! I couldn’t stop laughing. J told me it’s my fault. I clicked on the link! So, it only shows that I am interested in porn sites. Yay!

Filed Under: a discontented booger, talking booger ·

Wish for today

November 24, 2011 by · 2 Comments

Today, I learned that centering the image header can be deadly tedious. I searched all the web for the correct CSS trick and after 3 hours, turned out I only have to insert  ”margin: 0 auto” to have it centered. Yes, 3 hours. I kid not. I’m a slow learner.

Now, the only thing that concerns me is it’s not clickable. I already found the solution but it will ruin my layout so I’d rather have it this way. You can’t click it. And I know you won’t even bother so I guess it’s okay.

But I still want it clickable. So I’m going to find ways. Read tutorials again, search the web for free ebooks, and probably spend hundreds of hours experimenting on my blogs.

I read somewhere that all we need is 10,000 hours to master a skill. But since I’m a slow learner, that’d be x 10. So, I need a hundred thousand hours to fully understand this css thing :D

Anyway, this is the last. I won’t change themes. Ever. Again?

Filed Under: a discontented booger ·

Belated happy Halloween!

November 8, 2011 by · 3 Comments

As if I celebrated Halloween ;)

What did I do last Nov. 2? I observed All Souls’ Day. I went to Sta. Cruz Church and lit candles for our departed family members. One for Papa (grandfather), one for Inay (grandmother), one for Daddy, and one for a brother I never had the chance to meet.

When I was younger, I was very eager to know more about him. My mother said the baby was sleeping when she gave birth and my father never wanted to talk about it. She delivered him on August 8 and then a year later I was born on the same date. Can you believe that? Man, wherever you are, we have the same birthday :)

Somehow I sensed like it’s a family secret. Maybe there is something that they don’t want to tell. First, my father never talked about him. Second, we never went to the cemetery to visit him. Third, it seems that my mother doesn’t want to talk about it too. As a matter of fact, it was my cousin who told this thing to me. Marian said, “you know the tomb that Lola is taking care of? He’s not your cousin. He’s your older brother.”

When dad passed away, I raised the subject and asked a lot of questions to my mom. She said they don’t want to talk about it because it was the most devastating event for them as husband and wife. Also, they’ve decided not to tell the story to me and my siblings because he is forever gone and they’ve always considered me as the eldest. About his tomb, Lola and my Aunt Lilian are taking care of it.

Sigh* I’m not satisfied with my mother’s answers. I don’t know what is inside my mom’s heart. For sure there is nothing evil in it. She’s the kindest person I’ve ever known. It’s just a mystery to me why they chose to forget about him. I still want to acknowledge my brother as part of the family even if he never breathed.

Filed Under: a discontented booger, family matters ·

Back to school?

September 8, 2011 by · 2 Comments

I was very studious back then. Something my mother always tells to her friends’ children. Like I’m some kind of a model student. It’s embarrassing because it’s been 7 years since I got my degree and until today, it’s the same old story that she tells neighbors and relatives. LOL. She’s a proud mama. Now, this is not to say that I’m the brainy kind of student. As a matter of fact, it’s the opposite. I needed to study harder to cope up with lessons and other school requirements.

After college, I wanted to enroll in PNU (Philippine Normal University) for further studies. At the time, I felt teaching was my calling. But maybe it wasn’t because I always had reasons to postpone my plans of getting a certification in TEFL. I was busy and I couldn’t leave my job. Then I learned about Online Degree Programs that offer plenty of courses including teaching English as a foreign language. I planned to save for those expensive online schools. But before I was able to save half the price of the tuition fee, I lost interest.

Today, I am no longer interested in becoming a teacher. I just have an inkling that it’s not for me and that my two-years stint in teaching preschoolers is enough. I had a “taste” of it and I enjoyed it a lot so that should be enough. What interest me now is designing web pages. The problem is I don’t have the required skills in Photoshop and coding. I am confused if I should enroll in a real school or in online degree programs in art. I saw a $29-worth e-book that promises to teach everything about PHP, graphics and web customization.

I want that e-book! Although there are tons and tons of tutorials in the internet, I’m so tired of searching for the right solutions to my coding problems. Aside from searching is tiring, it’s also time-consuming. You see, between photoshop and coding, the latter is very difficult. At least, for me. Maybe for you it’s a piece of cake but for me it’s really “brain-crashing.”

Anyway, I saw this link hours ago: http://www.fafsa.ed.gov/. The headline says “Get help paying for college.” It made me wonder if such offers are available for non-US citizens? Because I want to send my application. LOL. I wish there was a way to learn web customization without fees and charges. But it seems that I will have to pay for everything including templates, pdf tutorials, graphical elements, etc. Sigh.

Filed Under: a career booger?, a discontented booger, blogging career, buying things i really don't need, Consider This, exploring the world, future plans, in the name of money, money desperate, money well spent, products and services ·

A very intelligent comment

July 28, 2011 by · 9 Comments

I have a blogging dilemma and it all started with a very intelligent comment from an accidental visitor.

Hey….I just read your blog while surfing the net, it is good to know that there are talented Filipinos working their ass on the online world. I am a writer too, I understand that we all have our own ways of expressing what we feel and sharing our experiences. However, no offense, I just find you kind of “bragging” than sharing your stories. I hope on your next blogs, you rather “share” your experiences to motivate other people who are interested in writing. Just a piece of advice, it would be better to share your talent in the right way by being a catalyst of inspiration to those who have talent same as yours but were not blessed to have the same opportunities. See you in odesk….who knows, we might be on the same team.

The problem? I realized that I am an irresponsible blogger. When I blog, I only think about myself. Although I try not to offend other people, I also don’t intend to serve as an inspiration. I can’t possibly inspire others. I’m not successful and if anything, I’m just a struggling freelancer. I can’t even call myself a writer cuz that would be an insult to those who studied years to become a professional writer. Anyway, when I first read the comment, I wanted to laugh. After writing about my insecurities and failures and bad experiences, people think I’m bragging.  So, I’m bragging. But I read again that post and realized that I really sounded like “bragging.” Suddenly, I am embarrassed. Suddenly, I felt the urge to just terminate my blogs and just stop blogging. Don’t get me wrong, I am not in any way offended by that comment. On the contrary, I think that it’s what they call “constructive criticism.” It’s just that suddenly, I feel that having 4 blogs is not worth my time.  It’s not beneficial to me or to anyone.

Filed Under: a career booger?, a discontented booger, blogging career, Consider This, in the name of money, talking booger, unforgettable memories, what they have to say ·
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